The darn good china

Royal Albert - Old Country Roses - sigh.

I just finished packing away all the "good china" from Christmas dinner. I'm emotionally trapped by this dinnerware. I inherited my grandmother's set of Royal Albert. I would not have ever chosen this china for several reasons - not the least of which being that it has to be hand washed. I'm trapped because I can never get rid of it. My mother would kill me. So I have to keep it and if I keep it, we might as well use it. I mean just one of the tea-cups costs $80, not including the saucer! So what's the point of having it sit in a box in the basement untouched? But I hate using it, because hand washing after Christmas dinner is a pain. Really there is beautiful high-quality dinner ware out that can go in the dishwasher and with a pattern that would be more "me". But I can't ever buy something like that because what would I do with all this damn Royal Albert?! I can't get rid of it. It was my grandmother's. Trapped.

Self Focus

I've realized that when I'm at work I tend to spend a fair bit thought energy on personal assessment. Am I good enough? Am I better than her? Am I good enough for this role? Or that role? Is he better than me? Am I smart?Am I where I should be by now? Do they like me? Ad nausea.

When I'm at home, with my family, I don't do that. It just stops. It's a relief.

Winter Biking

Last week I switched to my "winter bike". It's my mountain bike that has been into Bow Cycle for fitting with studded tires and had a winter tune up. I'm not sure what that is. Special grease on the chain? I want to try and bike to work through the winter. I've never done it before and I do reserve the right to bail out at any point I feel too wimpy. But so far so good.

I'm having fun accumulating winter riding attire. Long undies, face masks, lobster-claw mitts. But I think my favourite acquisition so far are my thermal fuzzy socks. They go under my cheap wall-mart runners. Over my runners I put my MEC cycling booties. So far keeping my toes warm is the hardest, but that seems to do it for now. I don't think I've hit a morning colder than -8 Celsius so far, so not much of a real challenge yet. I'm not sure why it would be problem to bike in regular waterproof boots - so I can always go there, with "hotshoots".

On the other hand, I keep overdressing my top. I'm very sweaty by the time I get to the office. I think I had it better worked out by Wednesday last week. Just at tank-top under my fleece with my biking jacket over. No more layers then that until it gets colder.

The studded tires seem good so far. I've only been in little bits of snow, but the paths are starting to iced up in spots. I'm actually looking forward to a bit more snow to see how the bike works in that.

Skipping Grandma

There is something kind of neat about walking the girls to school. I don't do it all that often. I'm normally off to work and Rob takes them. But every few weeks I get the chance. In the 10 or 15 minutes before the bell rings there seems to be a general to-ing and fro-ing of people walking kids to school from around the neighbourhood. Seems obvious I guess, but it makes up a neat little community of folks with a small shared goal and even understanding of problems. (i.e. the poor mom running with the kids at full stride down the sidewalk, three blocks away, seconds before the bell is set to ring.) Everyone says 'hi' or 'good morning' to each other - whether or not they know you. One of the girls' friends always yells out hi to me by name when she sees me because she thinks it's neat that I have the same name as her mom.

Today I saw three kids walking with their grandma. They were coming towards me on the sidewalk as I was returning from dropping the girls.

"C'mon Grandma! Skip with us!" one of the girls said.

"Okay," she responded, much to her credit.

I mean, how can you not smile and say good morning to a fully grown adult who skips past you on the sidewalk in the morning?

Today

I've been thinking I need to blog more. The problem is, of course, an ongoing lack of deep compelling topics. I've decided I don't care if I can't think of a deep compelling topic. Some time's I just feel like writing for writing's sake.

So, here's what we did today. Today is Saturday. We took two of the girls' bikes from our garage, that they weren't using anymore, and gave them to Good Life bicycle in Eau Claire. One was too little and the other was a failed attempt at a bigger bike for Emily. It's always good to get unused items out of our house! And Good Life is a neat place where you can donate bikes and get a bike for a donation. They will also help you fix up your own bike and teach you bike maintenance. It's non-profit, volunteer run. I think it's neat.

Then Rob, the girls and I had lunch at the Eau Claire food court. The girls played on the indoor play structure. Rob was talking about how although Eau Claire is no longer the really trendy high-end mall it was in its earlier days, that in some ways it's neater now with more of a community feel including tenants like Good Life. It is a strange mix now of high-end retail, junky stuff, community stuff, and empty space.

We came home to baby-sit Grace while Nicole went for her post-natal message. That had been a gift from us for her baby shower. Grace was good. She's super cute.

Now the kids are having an early bath in preparation for a pizza movie night.

That's it. I know it was mundane, but I needed to kick-start this writing thing.

Shrinking

Yeah! I've lost 8 lbs!

Lost on a Treadmill

Yesterday we had yoga class at lunch. I love yoga class at lunch. We have a great teacher from Heaven's Fitness named Leanne. I love Leanne. Sometimes the sessions can be a bit intense, but yesterday's was a bit more low-key with lots of triangle poses and stretching, but we got to do a hand stand against the wall. I love going upside-down. I think everyone should go upside-down once a day. It's just fun to go upside-down.

Today I had a pretty good session at the fitness centre. Rob has downloaded Lost for me as I bailed just before the end of season three so have some catching up to do. I wanted something to distract me from the fact I was running on a treadmill. I think it worked. I did 30 mins at 5 mph with a 1 incline. (One what, I'm not sure) I'm still not up to 5 k as I need to be for the triathlon in August.

I haven't weighed myself since my blowout on Monday. Since I've been pretty good since and tomorrow is Thursday, maybe I'll get up enough nerve to try tomorrow.

Blort

I give myself a "blow-out" time every week where I can eat whatever I want. It's getting less enjoyable though. "Blort" is a term my friends and I made up in high school to describe that icky feeling you get when you've eaten too much. Today I ate a lot. We went out for Chinese food for lunch. In the afternoon I was groggy and I was struggling to focus in meetings. I kept zoning out. By the time I got home from work I was exhausted. Eating better has an impact on my energy levels, for sure. I think I've gained a pound or two back from the 5 I lost, but I don't really want to go on the scale. I'm going to get back on track tomorrow!

Breath

So I'm getting the idea that focusing on breath is important in yoga. It's got me thinking about "breath". I guess you're actually not supposed to be thinking about much else anyway. I like it though. I like working to quite the mind and focus on something simple. It seems simple but the more I think about it, the more involved my thinking about breath becomes. In different poses I can imagine my breath being different "shapes" in my body. Tor example, as I told Nicole, in child's pose my breath feels frog-shaped. There's all the visualization that yoga teachers give about drawing in life and energy with each inhale and releasing, melting, grounding with each exhale. I can think of a slowly pulsing light. Sometimes I also think about how God created Adam in Genesis: ...."the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being." Breath is life. Life placed within us by God. It moves through us and sustains us by his grace and by his power. I can imagine it's the holy spirit - the breath of life - the breath of God moving in me. From there the meaning grows and evolves. Stop and take a deep breath.

Life

I've been working on a few things and I thought I'd write about it. I guess it's a general mind/body/spirit thing. I'm trying to lose a bit of weight - 20 lbs total. (Five down 15 to go! Yippy!)I've been trying to be more regular with fitness. I was talked into joining some colleagues at work for a triathlon in the summer. (All I have to do for that is run 5 K - but that's a challenge for me.) Also I've been dabbling in yoga which I find very interesting. On top of that it's Ash Wednesday, and I've given up chocolate for Lent. That's a whole bunch of stuff but it all seems to be running together in a healthful Zen-ish Christ-focused kind of thing. I'll pull out bits and write more in the coming days.

White Space

I like white space in layout and design. I'm not a designer, so I don't understand the technical principle behind white space or really how to use it properly. I just know my eye is drawn to a visual that includes it.

Then I realized I actually like "white space" everywhere. I like it in my cupboards at home. When they're crammed full of stuff it I'm not happy. I like it in my garage, in the spaces in my home and even in my mental chatter. Blank spaces, empty spaces that aren't crammed full. Space to breath and reflect. It seems important visually as well in practical life.

New Year's Resolution

To blog more.

Wordle

This neat site lets you take a block of text and it turns it into word art. I like it because it gives a different perspective on things you've written or work you've done. I think it could be an interesting exercise for teams working on projects. I wonder what would happen if my work team ran a new policy under development through Wordle, for example. We'll try it and I'll keep you posted. Here's one of mine from something we wrote a couple of years ago. Recognize it?

Solution Oriented Five-Year-Olds

Phew! Now the sheep won't escape!

Five-year-olds and Face Paint

We were cleaning out the garage yesterday and found some face paint we'd bought years ago for some early King's Bridge event. Probably the Stampede events we used to have when we were at the Cambrian Heights Community Centre. (Those were great events!). Emily & Kaylee decided they'd like to paint my face. They actually didn't do too bad.

Buffet Breakfasts and Social Media

Don't you hate it when you hit the buffet line just as the food is running out, but there are still a number of people behind you? Then no matter what you take it's the last scoop of something, last muffin or the last pat of butter. You can feel all the eyes behind you boring into your back with each thing you take. It was too much stress for a Thursday morning last week.

But on the bright side we heard a great talk on social media. I've heard so many talks on this subject now, they are all starting to sound the same, but I really liked Rob Cottingham's talk that he gave to the communications staff at The City of Calgary. Here's link to one of his video presentations. Check it out.

Driftwood sculptures

Kaylee was sticking pieces of driftwood in the sand in their sandbox. We collected these pieces of driftwood from near our lake - probably lake Kucanusa - on some excursion when I was in my early teens. They lived on a banana rack in the backyard of my dad's house for years. When we cleared out dad's house this past year, the pieces of drift wood wound up in the sandbox in my backyard.

Unaffected

We all want to be cool. Being cool means being unaffected. I find myself working at being unaffected. It seems often to be effective you have to be. Sounds odd, I know, but think off all the compassion professions where the professionals depend on remaining somewhat detached to be able to do what they need to do well. Councilors, doctors, social workers, aid workers etc. If they get too affected by the people and situations around them they loose the objectivity they need to do a good job. But there seems to be some kind of catch 22 there. Those who care less, do better? Doesn't seem right. Shouldn't it be that you are only at your best when you are fully engaged, plugged in and on fire? Isn't that where the impetuous for greatness comes?

Maybe I'm just all flustered because something started to get under my skin and just as I was trying to ignore it and remain, you know, cool, I walked past graffiti on a bridge railing that said, "Stop settling for what is wrong."

I don't really know what it means. It just affected me.

Done Dad's House

It took us over a year to empty the contents of Dad's house and do some "minor" renovations to the interior. New paint, flooring, tub & shower, venting the bathroom vent properly, trimming trees and a list of minor repairs and touch-ups. Shannon, Will, Rob and I have all worked pretty hard at it with a number of friends and family members pitching in along the way. The final weeks were a bit crazy as we coupled getting ready for Shannon & Will's wedding with a looming deadline on the house. Rob was there every day this past week when I was at work, as Nicole baby-sat the girls.

Yesterday evening our manager handed over the keys to the place to the new tenants. Yesterday morning Rob and the girls and I were there cleaning. It looked pretty good. There were some things that weren't perfect and there is more work needed. Especially on the outside, but I thought we were providing a nice place for the new family.

We had two cars with us for some reason. Rob took the girls and left first. I wandered from room to room making sure everything looked okay and thinking. There were some emotions. I wished my dad could see how the place looked now. I wonder what he'd think. He built the house for he, Shannon and I when my parents were divorced 30 years ago. He'd lived there until four months before he passed away.

Everything was mopped, dusted and polished. I collected our last items and glanced at the gift basked we'd left on the hearth for the new family. The little girl is not much younger than Shannon was when we first moved in. I felt a familiar mix of happy and sad as I pulled the locked door shut behind me. The house I grew up in is someone else's home now. I hope it's as much a blessing to them as it was to us.

Fractal funny

Found this. Even uses my fun new blue fractal!